Waiting To Exhale

First, thanks to all of you who called or texted 
or reached out to show you care.  It means the world.
Thank you so very very very much.

Second, we met with more doctors today and here's what we know:

Kyle still has cancer.

He's still terminal.

His cancer has NOT exploded inside of him, it has
stayed calm and steady.

Kyle still has ascites.

We don't know why yet.

Still.

Dr. Sharma has a "working hypothesis" that Kyle's
liver is showing signs of failure because of liver
toxicity.

This is his best guess, but he's not even sure.

Yet.

What is this liver toxicity he speaks of?

Well, the harrowing combination of Y 90 radiation
and the super toxic 5FU while holding the cancer
at bay (and beating it back even) has really
done some damage to the old piece of meat inside Kyle
that's growing the cancer.

(the liver)

Or ...

He could still have portal vein hypertension.

Or...

He could actually still just be in liver failure.

It seems like it should all be so easy to figure
out, but it's not.

Over the past 2 weeks Kyle's liver function numbers
have gone a little crazy, his bilirubin has also 
headed upwards...and he's retaining fluid in his 
belly.

Today numbers (blood) has steadied and his bilirubin
even had a little drop.

This would support the "working hypothesis" of
liver toxicity....IF IF IF his numbers keep improving.

(going down)

However, we need time to show us which way his
numbers (bloodwork) are going.

Up=bad
Down=Good

Waiting=excruciating

It's that glimmer we hoped for according to Dr. Sharma,
along with "all bets are off" and Kyle could still
be in trouble.  (Sharma's words, not mine)

Here's what else we know.

Tomorrow Kyle will have a fancy schmancy ultrasound to 
track the blood flow in and out of his liver.  They will
finally be able to see if he has compromised veins
or a clot blocking the portal vein causing poor
liver function and ascites.

IF this is the case, it is something they can work
with.  There are options, things to do and try.

They are also holding ALL chemo and rechecking Kyle's
blood work next week to see what liver function and
bilirubin are doing.

IF they are holding steady or doing down, it could
mean that Kyle did indeed have liver toxicity and
his liver could "feel better" if he takes a break.

(Or it could be the vein thing....or or or)

In short, we know some things, but not all things.

In fact, typing this out it hardly feels like we
know anything.

But we keep gathering information.

And so we wait to exhale.

A day at a time.

That's what we've got.

For today.