The party where Kyle announces he's really just a pedophile...or not.

Grace texted me the other day and said, "Mom, Dad gets along better with teenagers than with grown ups."

I texted back that I agreed.

She was watching him watch a volleyball game with the Olympus
volleyball team.

He was standing on the court, by the boys, arms folded across
his chest. (I wasn't there, but I've watched him enough to know
his exact stance at the game).

Talking to them, encouraging them, cheering them on.

He has helped coach the team for the past 3 years.

This year after learning of his diagnosis, they dedicated their season to him.

He was finally feeling well enough to go and watch a game.

It's true, Kyle likes kids.

All kinds of kids.

Big, little, short, tall, fat, thin, anywhere in between.

Just ask Josh's friends.

Or Grace's friends.

Or nephews, or cousins, or siblings, or any of our friends.

Or any of the youth and scouting groups he's worked with over
the years.

He is really just a giant kid at heart.

He likes to get dirty, hike, to camp, pee in the woods, swim, dig in the dirt, play Legos, rough house, fart, belch, and just plain have fun.

He is FUN!

If there is a toddler, he will get down on the floor and play
with them.

If there is a kid, he will talk to them about what they like
in life.

He talks sports, and movies, and music, and makes kids feel
comfortable around him.  

It's natural and no work at all.

Grace's friends love Grace's dad.

Josh's friends love Josh's dad.

ME?  I'm just the opposite.

I like using toilets, and having clean fingernails, and burping like a lady, and sitting on the couch rather than rolling around on the floor.

I am BORING!

Give me a good grown up and grown up conversation and I'm in element.

Give me a kid?  Or a teen?

Good heavens, I feel like the awkward teenager I was
all over again when I'm around them.

I don't know what to say, or what to do, or how to act.

So I make them food and then run away from them and hide.

I'll admit it, I'm not very cool.

Kyle is "cool" without even trying.

It's because he doesn't have to try.

Kids, they just like him.

Age 8 months to 18.

They gravitate to him.

A few years back Kyle's cousin had a Christmas party.

(Oh hey Libbi...)

She invited a bunch of people who didn't know each other.

But they all knew her.

We knew her, so we were invited.

To "introduce" ourselves to a bunch of strangers, to people we
had NEVER met, people who did NOT know us, we were
supposed to bring a gift.

A gift that "told" who we were.

A little bit about us.

Kyle brought Legos.

We then played a white elephant game where random people
opened gifts and we then told the group if it was OUR
gift and WHY we brought it.

Someone finally got to the box of Legos.

At which point Kyle was supposed to explain why he brought them.

He blurted out, "OH that was me!  I brought Legos because I
like to play with 14 year old boys."

There was a stunned and uncomfortable silence following his
announcement.

With horror growing in my heart, and on my face, I realized what
Kyle had just blurted out of his mouth in complete innocence without thinking.

Did he REALLY just say....

"I like to play with 14 year old boys!"

SERIOUSLY??!!?!  Did he just say that in a room full
of complete strangers?

My husband had basically just told a random group of complete strangers that he was basically a pedophile.

Only he's not.

In their minds anything was possible now.

Only he wasn't.

Or isn't.

Dear Lord, what had we done here?

People squirmed uncomfortably in their seats,
avoiding eye contact with us.

There were a few nervous laughs.

"Ermmmm, what he REALLY means...is he just likes kids!!" we tried to tell them.

Yes, as you can imagine that didn't seem to go over any better
with the group.

So now not only did he like 14 year old boys, but ALL children in
general.

Things were getting worse by the moment.

"Wait," we giggled nervously with sweat starting to pour down our faces, "he doesn't LIKE LIKE them.  He just likes to hang out with kids."

We were inching toward our coats and getting ready to run out the
door before people starting throwing egg nog at us.

"Like, he likes to hang out with them, and camp, and do stuff."

Ya, it wasn't ever going to get any better was it?

We tried one last approach.

"What he means, what WE mean is that he's just a kid at heart!"

YES!!  That's what we were trying to say, from the beginning.

Before we botched up the whole introduction.

"THAT'S why he brought Legos...to represent that he's a giant kid at heart!"

We breathed a giant sigh of relief.  And pressed onward.

"He's REALLY just a big KID at heart."

"He doesn't even really like kids."

"He just likes to ACT like a kid."

"In fact after today, he will never be alone in the same room 
with a kid again."

"Or in a room with kids ever again, period."

"You can TOTALLY trust your kids with him."

"No really, you can...ask Libbi!"

His cousin, who grew up with Kyle, just started laughing.

Soon everyone was laughing.

The party continued on and we left when it was done, swearing off Christmas parties for life.

And kids.

And Legos.

Especially parties where we didn't know people and had to 
bring Legos to introduce ourselves.

Needless to say, if Libbi has ever had another Christmas party
again...?

We haven't been invited back.

And if she ever does have another party, we will bring 
something like candy, or stray puppy.

Something completely innocent and benign.

Because we like to eat chocolate and we like dogs.

Something that has NOTHING to do with kids.

Or pedophiles.

And that's what I've got for today.

A funny story about my husband.

Hopefully he's better at fighting cancer than introducing 
himself at a party full of strangers.

So far, so good! -----------------------------------------------------------------

Round Nine of chemo was today at the Huntsman.

On Instagram "thebompie4".

It was "F cancer friday."

"F", Of course stands for "FLUFF Cancer Friday."

We used a FAKE middle finger, so as not to offend.

We "ring fingered" people off all day.

Except for the one time Kyle forgot.

We laughed and made it through another round.

Shelly, the PA, told Kyle his blood work was fantastic.

She used the phrase "best case scenario with this type of cancer."

We will take small blessings, like 'best case scenario blood work.'

His tumor marker (which 'loosely' measures the cancer in his blood) was back in normal range.

That's the easiest way to understand it--is now at 33 after 8 rounds of chemo.

He started at a 77.

Normal range is 0-37.

Numbers coming down that's a good thing.

We will take ALL good things on this road.

All good things.

Have a great weekend everyone!!

And hold on to your children if you see Kyle walking the
dog eating candy. (wink).